After 6 months of being accosted at bars, events, even work related functions, I longed for a nice old fashioned date. Last week, I finally found myself out to dinner, sitting across from a handsome, successful gentlemen on a 51st floor terrace, enjoying the most magnificent salmon, overlooking the most breathtaking park. It was one of the most beautiful nights. I was getting a little tipsy from the $500 bottle of wine and I thought I could not ask for anything more.
“So are you going to f*ck me or what?”, he said as my perfect night screeched to a halt like a record being ripped off its record player.
I was taken aback.
“Excuse me? This is our first date? Why did you just have to ruin it?” I said as my buzz began to subside.
“Well this dinner is expensive. Do you think I take EVERY girl out like this?” he replied.
Since when did dinner become a ticket for a lay? Did I come across as some prostitute?
“Did I come across as some hooker?”, I asked
I also don’t just bang anything I find attractive. And there are other things that are important like this beautiful weather and this bottle of wine..oh and me.
“No, not at all. Quite the opposite actually. I find you attractive, you find me attractive. I’m very sexual. I need sex. Don’t you need it too? ”
”Um yes I need it too, but I’m not an animal. I can control it. I also don’t just bang anything I find attractive. And there are other things that are important like this beautiful weather and this bottle of wine..oh and me.”
“Is that a no?” he asked.
“If I was going to have to spread my legs and blow you for a dinner, I would have stopped at the drinks and saved myself a few calories no matter how many I would’ve worked off in the boom boom room”.
“Ohhhhhh…boom boom room. That’s kind of turning me on…”
“Don’t you want to get to know a woman?” I asked.
“Well I’m not looking for a relationship right now. And if I was, sex is the most important part of a unity. If you’re not having good sex, what’s the point in continuing a relationship. Eventually the initial excitement will wear off. I’ll need a woman who’s going to be able to keep it going, not matter how long we stay together.
Sounds like he needs a hooker at your beck and call.
“Please don’t flatter yourself. I wasn’t looking for a relationship with you, yet.” I stated.
Whatever happened to picking up a female, taking her out on a date, paying for the bill, then dropping her off or putting her in cab home…WITHOUT trying to jump her bones?
He did come across as a keeper, but I wasn’t banking my new pair of Louboutin’s on it.
Based on my New York City dating experience so far, “too good to be true” is usually, “too good to be true”. BINGO! This guy was too good to be true.
“After this behavior, there’s 100% chance you won’t be seeing me again. IT’S OUR FIRST DATE!” I started getting irritated.
“Jesus Christ. I’m so out of here. Don’t worry, I’ll catch my own cab!” I yelled.
Whatever happened to picking up a female, taking her out on a date, paying for the bill, then dropping her off or putting her in cab home…WITHOUT trying to jump her bones? Is that too much to ask? And on a FIRST Date? How did my knight in shining armor turn into a smushy douche bag?
Have we, as women, really become valued based on our sexual performance and/or willingness to utilize all 3 orifices? Is it just New York City men or other Metropolitan men in the US? Who raises these men? Did their mother die? Were they raised by apes? Did they learn this from one of their classless buddies who “appears” to get all the chicks? It is not like this in Boston. Has the value of intelligent, educated and moral women just disappeared? Have they been replaced by women who suck and fuck at the drop of a dime, while sexually up for anything?
Is this how it’s going to be dating in New York City? Is this something I’m just going to have to accept in the dating world of a single 27 year old female? If so, I’m heading back to Beantown very soon!!!
Nancy Lee is a new dating and relationship, sex columnist. She will be writing on her experiences throughout her dating career. A recent graduate of Boston University, Nancy has seen it all. The purpose of her column is to educate and inform young women, through her own life experiences, on the trials and tribulations of being a young woman in today’s dating world. Nancy hopes to connect with the readers and hopes the women (and men) can identify with her experiences. Hey – “ It’s hard out there for a pimp! She looks forward to your feedback. Name changed for obvious identity purposes. Leave your own Christmas Men stories below. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to leave at the bottom or send her a private email at firstname.lastname@example.org