So I’ve given background on my interracial relationship with a Black man. So the next question is why wouldn’t I date an Asian man?<\/p>\n
I’ve actually been confronted with that question by a friend who is Asian (Vietnamese). He told me that he admired me because I wasn’t a typical Asian girl on campus who clung to her usual Asian friends – I hung out with other races, mainly Blacks. Our conversation had me thinking about why Asian men were so different from Black men and why I wouldn’t date an Asian man. <\/p>\n
Here were my reasons for why I wouldn’t\/haven’t dated an Asian guy (This is not<\/u> at all representative of Asian men (particularly Vietnamese men) – just what I noticed when it comes to my interactions with Asian guys in NOLA)<\/b>.<\/p>\n
Here’s what we discussed: <\/p>\n
They’re not outspoken or forward when approaching women<\/b> – I find that most Asian guys either take forever to tell you that they’re into you or don’t say anything at all – they always want to be your friend. I tend to be drawn to guys who are more direct and let you know they’re into you instead of beating things around the bush.<\/p>\n
They remind me too much of my dad<\/b> – (this is more of a personal thing for me) I know that men\/women learn their behavior characteristics from their fathers\/mothers; therefore Asian men make me feel like they’ll end up being just like their fathers – stern, grumpy, old-school, judgmental – maybe more like my grandpa to be exact. Things I feel like Asian men pass down to their sons. <\/p>\n
I don’t have enough physical attraction for them<\/b> – Asian men tend to be short. Since I’m short (4’11”) I don’t want my man being short too. I want to feel protected if I’m standing next to him. Also, Asian men tend to have more effeminate traits and less masculine figures than other men. Or it’s the total opposite – there are ones that act like a “gangster” – not cute. A Vietnamese girl friend of mine agreed with me on this one. Since she’s a bit more curvaceous than your average Vietnamese girl – not even chunky or big, just has more hips – she wants a guy who’s bigger and taller than her who can handle her curves, so she dates a White guy.<\/p>\n
His response was quite defensive. He says the reason why Asian men are not forward is because of culture and being a gentleman<\/b> – it’s the woman’s job to let him know if she’s interested; allowing the woman to take the first step so that the guy does not come off as a creep. His whole argument was that Vietnamese guys are traditional and if that means being like his dad or acting shy, then so be it. <\/p>\n
As for the other reasons, those are things Vietnamese guys cannot change – especially the attraction. You either have the swag or you don’t.<\/i> <\/p>\n
Regardless, I do believe beautiful relationships come from same race relationships, so it is not my intention to bash on the Asian man<\/b><\/i>. My whole thing about not dating Asian (Vietnamese) guys is that once you see how most of them are, you either like it or you’re turned off by it. I’m the latter I guess.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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