{"id":9974,"date":"2011-08-12T00:08:22","date_gmt":"2011-08-12T00:08:22","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2025-10-15T11:01:51","modified_gmt":"2025-10-15T11:01:51","slug":"brilliant-or-beautiful-pick-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/asiancemagazine.com\/?p=9974","title":{"rendered":"Brilliant or Beautiful — Pick One"},"content":{"rendered":"

Two of the smartest women I\u2019ve known have had one-syllable surnames: Tina Su and J.J. Wu.<\/strong> Tina was prettier, but J.J. was smarter, smarter than I. I married Tina, and I co-authored technical papers with J.J., who had a deep, eventual unhappy, romance with another Caucasian scientist. <\/p>\n

Tina\u2019s first marriage, to a Chinese scientist, had been unhappy, too. Neither brains nor beauty nor both guaranteed success. American poet Robert Frost wrote about the unexpected consequences of the options selected by a very pretty woman in “The Lovely Shall be Choosers”. Still, one would like to be bright and good-looking, along with rich, and artistic and \u2026. <\/p>\n

I will immodestly quote myself from my memoir, “Ting and I”:<\/p>\n


\nWould you rather be beautiful (handsome, for men) or smart?
\nTo sharpen that question, let the choices be
\n\t\u2014average intelligence, 1 in 1,000 in good looks
\n\t\u2014average looks, 1 in 1,000 in intelligence.<\/p>\n

The advantages of being good-looking are many and well-known. Life, at least while young, generally goes more smoothly. People respond more favorably. Your other abilities are probably overestimated because of it. People are drawn to you. And yet, you can draw the wrong kind of attention from the wrong people. Incest or recruitment into homosexuality or sexual molestation is more likely. You may tend to try to \u201cget by on your looks,\u201d rather than cultivate your other strengths. Your early choices may result in bad results.<\/p>\n

Unusually pretty and unusually smart, Tina has been blessed. One of our nurses speculated that her wealthy ancestors in China were able to be highly selective in whom they chose for mates for their children. Eugenics in action.<\/p>\n

In my mother\u2019s era, women often found it wise to hide their intellects. Beauty trumped brains. I think that has changed, for the good. Being average in looks is not a major hindrance, and being smart is clearly a plus. Still, whether you are a man or a woman, you can make those around you uncomfortable by showing off your intellect. Use it to make better decisions, to progress at home or work. Don\u2019t be too proud: Even if your intellect is as rare as 1 in 1,000, this country has 300,000 people as smart or smarter.<\/p>\n

<\/em>
\nMy brother is much more handsome than I. I realized this most dramatically when the two of us walked somewhere together and I noted women\u2019s heads following us, something that had never happened when I walked alone. He\u2019s had a fine career and a very happy marriage, but his best friend died in a motorcycle accident and an early deep romance dissolved painfully. Neither good looks nor high intelligence insulated him from loss.<\/p>\n

When I was a researcher at IBM, I was puzzled by the rapid rise in management of a fellow scientist of only moderate credentials and achievements. Those in the know pointed out that his tallness and good looks gave him the \u201cIBM management look.\u201d When you and I watch the news on TV, we are not surprised that the featured \u201cjournalists,\u201d actually \u201cnews readers\u201d turn out to be unusually good looking. A recent study of women in New York City, showed they would find a shorter man making tens of thousands of dollars per year more about equally attractive as one an inch taller. <\/p>\n

I could console myself that my intellect allows me to understand such issues, and thus compensate for my less-than-stellar looks, but life is not fair. The beautiful but not-so-smart may have no inclination to ponder such things. They shall be the choosers. I wish them well: they should choose wisely, if they can.<\/p>\n

Douglas Winslow Cooper, Ph.D., is a freelance writer and retired physicist whose book, Ting and I: A Memoir of Love, Courage and Devotion, is due to be published in September 2011 by Outskirts Press (Denver, CO). His email address is douglas@tingandi.com, at his web site.
\n<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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