Power Play – Dating an Alpha Male

Make no doubt about it: Dating the alpha male is a very unique experience! Being with an alpha male can be exhilarating. It can make you feel like you are the happiest woman on earth. An alpha male has a way of giving the right kind of attention, the kind that makes you feel as though no one else matters to him right at that moment. But then that moment is gone, and he can make you feel as though your heart will never heal. The alpha male can put you on a rollercoaster and break your heart if you aren’t careful! That’s why it is SO important to know how to date an alpha male. It is especially helpful if you know how to date him before you actually start dating him. The power play of dating an alpha male begins before the first date.

RULE #1: KEEP YOUR COOL
Start by staying cool about the situation. Remember that the alpha male is incredibly charming and sweet, and he can sweep you off your feet in the time it takes to ask you for a date. Before you say yes, say no! Stay cool and tell him that you have to look at your calendar. Tell him that you have a date for that evening already (hopefully, you do.) Tell him that you need to think about it. HE will play it cool and say that’s fine, then saunter away as if he has already forgotten about you. But the next time he sees you, he will remember. And that’s when the games begin.

RULE #2: PLAY HARD TO GET
He is accustomed to fighting for what he wants and usually winning it. He might be used to seeing women fall for him every single day. He is definitely used to getting his way when it comes to dates. This is where playing hard to get is vitally important. By being unavailable to him, you make yourself more of a mystery. By making him work to get that date with you, you make him feel intrigued by you. Tease him. Taunt him. Play with him and watch him join in the game. He loves to be challenged, and that’s exactly what you are doing. By the time you do say yes to that date, he will have the flush of victory -and that feeling is enough to hook the alpha male on you. At least for a while.

RULE #3: REMEMBER WHAT YOU’RE GETTING INTO
Since most things with alpha males are very temporary at first, know what you are getting into when you decide to date one. He might blow hot for several weeks, shower you with gifts, and think you are the most amazing woman in the world. But never forget that he still has plenty of other women on this speed dial. (Not a problem at all if you have plenty of men on yours bc there are plenty more alpha males where he came from, right?) After a few weeks, he will seem to lose interest. This usually happens when he realizes that he is REALLY getting into you and the thought of it scares him a little. YAWN what else is new?? That’s when he will back off and maybe even start dating other women again. The trick to handling this is to simply let him do it. You should date other people, too. There will be many weeks of back and forth when it comes to the alpha male. But eventually, he will get jealous of the other guys you are dating, and he WILL come back. (That is if you haven’t gotten sick of him before he does.)

RULE #4: LOOK FOR SIMILAR GOALS
Is all of this really worth it, you ask? It might be. But before you actually fall in love with the alpha male, here are a few things to consider. First, are his life goals the same as your own? If he is an attorney who is looking to build his own practice, remember that he will be focused on his job for at least the next decade. That might mean that your goal of having a husband and children in a few years might not actually work with this guy. But if you are a go-getter yourself and want to build your career even further before settling down, this might be a good guy to date. It is important to consider what YOU want and need from a relationship. Though dating the alpha male can be a real thrill, it pays to think about whether he will be around for the long haul. If you decide he’s not, simply continue to play it cool. Date him if you want, but keep your options open. When he asks you why you aren’t falling head over heels in love with him yet, simply tell him that you have separate goals in life and too many other interesting men to spend time with. He might see that as a challenge. “Tell me more,” he might say. And then you tell him. And then he decides if he can handle what you really want. In some cases, he might agree and you part as friends. But sometimes you might be very surprised. Over time, the alpha male can become very attached to you like an old comfortable shoe. He might even fall in love with you. If he does, that changes everything!
I really do not recommend this however. Get your own life. Believe me, if the chemistry is there-he will act very fast! Otherwise it is a rollercoaster waiting game and YOU will end up in a terrible marriage because he will feel that he was tricked into marrying you and ended up settling. Trust me, when men know what they want they make it their business to own it fast. You simply know when you know.

RULE #5: BE PREPARED TO WALK AWAY
Alpha men love women who are independent, sassy and obviously have their own rich lives going on. They also love women who are willing to go toe-to-toe with them – as long as they win in the end. But you must be willing to take that one step further and actually walk away from the alpha male if he is too resistant to commitment. By being willing to walk away, you might find that he notices you even more. (The minute you break up the engagement, marriage, etc. they all become crazy stalkers so beware!) After all, he’s about to lose the prize! If you walk away, the chase is over, and that means he LOST. And the alpha male HATES to lose. When he realizes that you are actually willing and able to walk away, it will trigger an intense response in him. One of those “I can’t let her get away!” responses. A man who realizes he is about to lose the woman he might be falling in love with is a very changed man. By simply walking away, you might spark the REAL relationship you have wanted from him just to realize that you never wanted him in the first place (which is my lifelong problem)! It is always the chase that keeps me going but don’t let me catch you bc I’ll dump your ass so fast! On the other hand, an ultra-cool alpha male might cut his losses and moves on because he can’t afford to lose anything and knows that he undoubtedly will. That’s a possibility that you have to consider when you start dating him. So you attract another man who will worship you and who can actually afford to give you all the things you need–not just pretends to. But before you get to that point, go back to rule number one and use it on that gorgeous alpha male you have been lusting over lately. You are in for a great time!

To the happiness you deserve!

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