Chris & Lindsay’s Engagement

Chris and Lindsay’s wedding will be anything but traditional. Lindsay is English, German and Irish and Chris is Malaysian and Chinese. Both are Christian, but they decided against a church wedding. The couple will be getting married in Altun Ha, Belize, a Mayan ruin with great symbolism. Love is in the air!

ASIANCE: Where did you meet?

We met in his coffee shop, Aloha Grinds, in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. I had just moved to the neighborhood and wanted something other than Starbucks. Luckily we started talking and realized that we have a ton in common, such as our love for karaoke, The Office, and sushi. Because we always talked in his store in the morning before I went to work, it was hard for him to find a time to actually ask me out. I didn’t realize this and thought perhaps he wasn’t interested in me. About two months from our initial meeting, he finally asked me out and we went to have sushi! We have been together since March 11, 2010.

ASIANCE: Tells us about your backgrounds!

I have English, German, & Irish heritage. I was born in Ohio and raised in Indiana. It was a lifelong dream to move to New York and I made the leap right after graduating college. I’ve been here for 4 years now. Chris was born in Taiwan and he is of Malaysian and Chinese heritage, although his family mostly conforms to Chinese traditions. His family moved to the US (Denver, CO) when he was an infant and then moved to Brooklyn, NY when he was about 5 years old. He’s lived here most his life, with a few years in San Francisco, CA and Honolulu, HI (hence the inspiration for his coffee shop). He had been back in Brooklyn about a year before we met.

ASIANCE: Tell us about the proposal!

My favorite! Well, it was both surprising and not. I’ll explain. On June 26, 2011, his younger brother got married in a huge, lavish wedding. We both told each other at the wedding that it was exactly what we didn’t want. While we were at the wedding, he said he was going to get his wallet to tip the bartenders. As I was walking around, I noticed he was on the phone. Since he was the best man, I kind of snapped at him because his brother had been looking for him and needed his help. Little did I know he was on the phone with my dad asking for my hand. The next day, everything was normal. He had been acting kind of weird, but I just thought he was still a little upset for me getting on him about being on the phone. The following day, June 28, I had been thinking about weddings all day. Call it a woman’s intuition. So then I get home and encounter rose petals leading to our door (we live in the first apartment on the first floor). I knew something was up. I went in the apartment and there were rose petals everywhere (and I mean everywhere, photos attached). On the table, there were a dozen roses (which I still have!) and a ring box. I was waiting for him to pop out somewhere. I called out his name to no response. He obviously knows my curious side, so I opened the box. It was filled with wine corks we’d drank and a little post-it note, “Not yet. Text me.” I could barely form my words on my iPhone and texted him. I will always laugh at his response, “Put on something comfortable and grab some Gatorade. Come to the park (Owl’s Head Park).” So I did as he said, all the while with butterflies in my stomach. I was calling my parents, babbling incoherently. They got the message though. It was about to happen.

I arrived at the park and he acted very coy. I was all, “what’s going on?” and he was all, “how was your day?” We walked toward a bench and took a seat. He pulled out his iPhone and started playing a playlist of “our songs”, which includes Empire State of Mind, Part II and Avalanche by Hillsong United. He gets down on one knee and starts reciting beautiful, sweet words that I will never remember. I was already crying. He pulled out the ring and asked me the big question. I just kept nodding and I didn’t even look at the ring. I was just so happy to be engaged to the man of my dreams.

The Wedding

We will be getting married in Altun Ha, Belize. It is a Mayan ruin with great symbolism. The planning on our end had been very difficult. We started out in New York, renting a penthouse. Due to the very high costs of weddings in New York, we decided that we didn’t want to deal with the hassle. All of my family lives in the Midwest, so it also meant they would all have to travel. We decided to save the money and the stress and to have a planned elopement, which means the ceremony will be just us and the officiator. We are both romantics, so being halfway across the world devoting ourselves to each other in a private ceremony seemed more our speed.

We will be coming back to Indiana to have a reception, which will then be followed by a family dinner and karaoke (of course) in New York.

ASIANCE: Tell us the details including the cultural aspects which you will be incorporating from each side.

Although we are both Christian, we decided against a church wedding. We both know what’s in our hearts and we don’t need to be in a certain building to portray that. While we were sensitive to his heritage, Chris didn’t want to incorporate the entire day-long Chinese tradition with tea and meeting families. This is mostly due to the fact that his mother has passed away and no one else in his family practices it. We did however, incorporate the numbers aspect into our wedding date (June 22, 2012). Two is considered lucky and “good things come in pairs.” Our regular anniversary is 3/11, so we doubled it to get 6/22. Although six isn’t the best number, we were happy with the date as a whole. At the reception in Indiana, it will be traditionally American with the bride and father dance, a cake cutting ceremony, and tossing the bouquet. In NY, we will be having a traditional family-style Chinese meal.

ASIANCE: Do you have a theme and tell us about the inspiration for the wedding?

Our theme from day one was to make it our own. We like being different and unique. There aren’t many Caucasian female and Asian male couples. We take pride in our relationship and we both have a huge love and respect for each other. We have both taught each other to appreciate and accept our culture more and to delve into one another’s different traditions and beliefs. We wanted that to come through. Also a big factor? It’s not about the wedding, it’s about the marriage. Because of our faith, we both do not believe in divorce or materialism/overconsumption. We wanted to keep it simple and not forget why we’re getting married in the first place. Our engagement has been mostly stress-free and not involved the typical trials, such as the planning snafus, invitation stress, etc. Our colors are lavender and pink. My favorite flower is lilac and he likes when I wear pink.

ASIANCE: Who designed your dress?

I think I hold the urban myth of wedding dresses. I ordered my dress online, for $70, from Ideeli.com. It’s a cream ABS by Allen Schwartz gown and fits like a dream. I didn’t need any tailoring at all. It’s a fitted, silk dress with a cowl neck, a slight train, and a low back. It’s exactly what I wanted. I also found my pink Stuart Weitzman’s at Nordstrom Rack for $100. My jewelry is borrowed and you can see it here: http://www.blackandblondeone.com/wedding-jewels/. I will also be wearing a fascinator (this style, in white): https://www.etsy.com/transaction/53208631. Overall I wanted a relatively simple and classic look, with just a little pizzazz!

ASIANCE: The cake designer?

We won’t be having a cake at our ceremony, but we will be having a cake at the Indiana reception. It’s a family friend who is also a baker. She makes delicious varieties of cakes and has a special icing with a slight cherry flavor to it. Unfortunately she does not have a website to share. This will be our cake topper, http://www.figsandginger.com/item.php?item_id=91&category_id=6.

ASIANCE: Florist and Photographer/Videographer?

This will be my bouquet, https://www.etsy.com/transaction/62877999, but in an actual bouquet form as opposed to how it’s shown. I wanted something to go along with our colors, and I wanted a faux arrangement, so I could keep it forever. Our photographer will be Jose Luis Zapata, who is based in Belize. http://www.joseluiszapata.com/ He is very talented and his specialty is focused at our location. I can’t wait to do our photos! We will not be hiring a videographer.

Honeymoon

Our honeymoon will also be taking place in Belize. We will be staying there a total of 2 weeks. We eventually chose Belize for a few reasons. It has a rich culture. It has plenty of things to do on land and on water (such as scuba diving, archeology digs, and cave-based lazy rivers). It’s somewhere neither of us has been and it is still a relatively secret tourist location. Although we don’t have formal plans for what we’re going to do, we have a few things in mind. We actually just found out that there is a lobster festival while we’re down there, so we’ll definitely be hitting that up!

I also wanted to share with you our wedding bands, since they are pretty unique and special. http://www.blackandblondeone.com/fingerprint-wedding-bands/ They are fingerprint wedding bands. On his band, my fingerprint is on the outside. On my band, his fingerprint is on the inside. Again, it’s a very romantic and special thing we wanted to have.