Yellow Fever
“Check out that bird!” I was out with my girlfriend and our common guy friend had yet to take his eyes off the Chinese girl with long jet black hair walking by our table. She was wearing skinny jeans and a revealing yet flattering top. “I totally have a crush on her,” he said.
For me, it’s all aesthetics… I love how Asian girls look – ” the silky black hair, the Oriental features, the petite frame and the twinkly brown eyes.
“You have a crush on every Asian girl on earth,” my girlfriend retorted.
He wagged his fingers. “Nope, not EVERY Asian girl,” he said. “Just Chinese ones.”
“Can you even tell the difference?” I asked him. All I got was a shrug and a smile.
Aaah, the infamous yellow fever…
A few of years ago, when I was still living in Boston, I had a simplified idea of what yellow fever is. It was when my friends and I would go clubbing and all these white guys would come flocking around us. We’d get silly lines like “You know, I go to Chinatown a lot” or “I think the Scorpion Bowl is awesome! It’s the best drink ever!” or “I love eating Shanghai fried rice and crab rangoon!” Once, I went out with my Greek roommate to Greek night at Caprice. I approached the bar and as I asked for my usual martini, the guy nearby peered at me and said “My friends and I were wondering, what’s a Chinese girl doing here at Greek night?” It took me about twenty minutes to explain to them that I’m not Chinese and that yes, I spoke English. I didn’t have to buy another drink after that but the night ended with me a) very very very drunk b) turning down three – ” I kid you not – ” marriage proposals c) declining a job offer to work at this guy’s pizza place for $15 an hour and d) having about ten table napkins with phone numbers scribbled on them.
Fast forward to about a year and a half ago, when I first moved to Singapore; that was when I saw yellow fever taken to a whole different level. Sure, the basics are still there but instead of it being a mere fetish, I realized that over here, it was more of a subculture. It possesses a seemingly negative connotation even though it is widely accepted as a way of life.
“For me, it’s all aesthetics,” says Ken, a Canadian who has spent a decade living in Asia. “I love how Asian girls look – ” the silky black hair, the Oriental features, the petite frame and the twinkly brown eyes.” Asian women have earned certain stereotypes such as being deferential, conservative and filial to their family.
In more traditional Asian cultures, a woman’s role is more or less set in stone and there is a particular routine to be followed through the course of her life – ” go to school, help out at home, find a good husband and until wedding bells ring, she is to live at home with her parents while working and contributing to the family income. And in a cultural hub like Singapore, where the East meets the West (rather, where the Western lads meet their Eastern lasses), this kind of Asian culture can be incredibly fascinating to the neophyte Westerner whose first time it is to cross the borders of Europe or North America.
Walking down Boat Quay on a typical Wednesday night, I would spot Caucasian men (locally referred to as “Ang Moh”) sporting their power suits, their Blackberries and mobile phones in tow, wining and dining their lovely Asian ladies. It always intrigues me what transpires in their conversations. Sometimes, I hear about situations from friends and acquaintances wherein the language barrier remains to be the ignored elephant in the living room. “It’s not that [the Asian women] can’t speak English but some of them, their listening English was better than their spoken English thus making it hard to express themselves properly,” Ken disclosed to me. “And there are also instances where our senses of humor just don’t connect.” And other times, there just weren’t enough things to talk about. Either they have difficulty in getting to know each other in a language that they both understand or they simply have nothing in common. And I’m not just talking about hobbies, but also beliefs, philosophies and values in life.
I’ve noticed, however, the presence of a new breed of Asian women in… well, Asia. With Singapore being in the same league as Hong Kong and Japan when it comes to international business and career opportunities, it is only natural that people in Europe, Australia and North America be lured to come over. And this group does not only consist of the proverbial Westerners, but also the overseas Asians. There are two kinds of overseas Asians: those that have been born and raised overseas, and those that have been born and raised in Asia, spent a good amount of time overseas (may it be for university or work), then come back to Asia. And both groups carry with them elements from both the East and the West. This allows them to be slightly more culturally adept and to possess a greater worldly dimension.
“I reckon that Asian women are becoming more and more empowered,” shares Dean, a British broker who has lived and worked all over Asia for more than 20 years now. “I think Asian women tend to be more educated and to have better book and theoretical values. There’s a lot of pressure to excel and succeed here compared to, let’s say, Europe.” There has been a growing trend going abroad to attend university or to gain some work experience. Ultimately, though, it is those who have Western experiences that bring a different light into Asian women.
“That gives [the Caucasians and Asians] more common ground,” proclaims Dean. Similarly, Ken admits, “The best dates I’ve gone on are with [Asian] girls who have had some sort of Western influence or exposure. Like someone who has spent a good amount of time in the States or who has been with a foreign boyfriend before.” They both claim that although they accept that Asian culture can be worlds apart from the Western culture, there should still be some middle ground that they can work on. The fascination of learning about a different culture is present as well as a certain sense of familiarity.
On a more personal note, I find that it is those pioneer expatriates here in Singapore who find succor in Asian women enriched with Western exposure. Of course, there are still those who prefer Asian women in their truest and purest form. They concede to the attraction and initial impacts of exotic and mysterious beauty. And a few of them noticeably have the white-knight complex where they feel that need to save their damsels from the hardships of the life in Asia. Regardless of their partialities, they all still share the same penchant for Orientals.
Yellow fever is truly more than an idée fixe. It’s a key factor in the convergence of cultures consequently contributing to global shrinkage. It’s also a sociological matter where people’s curiosities are piqued and acted on. After all, isn’t it just human nature to want to explore what’s outside the norm?
Lia Santos is based in Singapore. She was born and raised in the Philippines and was sent to Boston for 6 to 7 years for college (and ended up working there for a couple of years). Lia eventually ended up going back to Singapore (last year) to work in a financial research house doing research on the economic markets with no plans of leaving, YET.
I agree with Ken! He makes some very good points regarding Asian women. But I don’t think it’s just a fetish for those of us based here: if we were in Italy, most of the girls we dated would be Italian, wouldn’t they? I’m also surprised that no mention was made of the “SPG”: local women who are looked down upon for their preferance towards European men.
liaaaaaaaaaaa 😉 great job!!!!
That’s funny. You didn’t say much about the asian woman that were born and raised in the states. They make up the largest interracial marriage/relationships. Asian woman and white men. Apparently that’s not the case for asian men and white woman, but I have a few relatives that married white woman. I prefer asian woman because I can relate to them. But I like asians that are from different cultures. Like you said, “…isn’t it just human nature to want to explore what’s outside the norm?”
on your first article. Many more to come!
I’m an Indian guy and I’ve been attracted to Asian women ever since I came back from a trip to Southeast Asia. The problem is that most of the Asian women prefer white guys, even if they’re below average in the looks department. I can’t win. Either Asian women start liking me or I lose my attraction for them, until then it’ll be a frustrating and lonely existence for me.
Yellow fever purely works in one direction: White male + Asian female. In North America, you would be right Vikram. Indian men have a harder time compared to white guys.. the same goes for other ASian men. In Asia, your chances are a little better (compared to Chinese guys), especially if you portray yourself as a Westerner.
Still won’t be valued as highly as the White man by the ladies though. This is a cultural phenomena based on a combination of superficial motives, social programming, ethnic stereotypes and physical attraction that is beyond any of our control (not even Asian females).
It’s clear why many men prefer AFs. But it would be interesting if someone were to do a study on what the AF finds attractive about the WM.
I hate Asian women who think they are better becasue they date a white man. You guys have been so brainwashed by Western media with all the WM/AF couples that they promote. Your self worth is based on how many guys want to screw you. What you don’t realize is that these same white guys can get women just like you in Asia for only $20. What is the difference between you and the prositutes in Asia?
What is up with Filipino and their colonial mentality?
the funniest part is that in my experience, filipino women are the most gloatful in being “PROUD TO BE A FILIPINA.” It’s like a cultural showcase BUT they ALWAYS date white men BY FAR, all the while proclaiming their pride. I totally understand a racially diverse dating pattern, but that is NEVER the case. If it was, asian men would look like idiots though they probably wouldn’y be saying anything about IR anyways. The SOLE reason why asian women don’t have a rock to stand on in there arguments is because they only go for white (like many of the writers of this magazine: Jennifer Lee KENT, give me a break, pick one and live with it). All other races (asians incl.) put together don’t even compare. Nobody buys that he just happens to be white excuse anymore because a) most people have smartened up (it only took decades of evidence and pent up frustration) and b) most of us have left the 90’s. Now, someone care to explain to me what filipino pride is?
I agree 100%. It is unfortunate that some men can’t see past the stereotypical “exotic” Asian woman. Too many guys seem to see an Asian girl as just another sexual conquest. Its a shame really. Very good article!
Wait — me NOT love you long time? Next you’ll say — Me NOT so horny.
Great advice!! Thanks Candace!!
Great piece Candace, Relationships are built upon more than mere beauty. Yellow fever is based not on a true interest of an Asian woman but idol worship. It reduces Asian woman to mere objects.
Please post more articles Candace. I am sure you already experience this subject.
Ugh when will this fascination over Asian women go away! On the one hand it’s kinda flattering… but in general it’s mostly creepy how just being Asian will automatically increase you by 10 hotness points in the eyes of some men. Recently when I was in Vegas I kept getting approached by men saying “Konichi wa” (hello, I’m not Japanese) and continually telling me how much they loved Asian women – so gross and I hope no actual Asian falls for this type of condescending “compliment”.
This is a handy article. I’m a white male, 23, and live in the Midwest. I dated a lady from Kobe, Japan for three years. As a freshman I signed up for mandarin and took it for two years, not because I had yellow fever but literally because I thought it was cool that there was a language written with pictograms, and didn’t want to take German, Spanish or French. Not to mention it is the most widely spoken language on the planet. I can honestly say that after that whole experience I am not attracted to women from around my part of the country anymore. My girlfriend wasn’t submissive, or exotic in yellow fever terms, and I never looked at her as a conquest trophy. That kind of mentality makes me sick. We genuinely loved one another. She had to move back to Japan and we thought we were too young to mary. The long distance thing failed after about nine months. Now I am completely heartbroken and want to get as far away from the Midwest as I can. I was genuinely enjoying dating someone from another culture, and I am quite frankly bored to death with my own culture. Does this make me a creep?
It sounds like you are not the “creep” she is warning about. You view your gal as a person, not just an Asian caricature. But, just like some guys only see the boobs, ass or face — some dudes obsess on the fetish aspects of Asian culture, and forget the real live human being in front of them …
Why do Asian women always act like they’re some kind of “victim” when they know full well that this whole “Yellow Fever” phenomenon works in their favor? Even MissJ admits, “On the one hand, its kind of flattering…”.
Yes it is. Better than not being adored and sought out by any guy. And what about all the Asian women with White Fever?
Its easy for Asian women to go around pretending like they’re some kind of victim or disgusted by the label, but last time I checked, those are the EXACT same Asian females who go out seeking “white guys only” while dissing and rejecting their own blood.
That sounds more like “White Fever” to me. I don’t know if the author is one of these types, but I would HOPE NOT for it would be quite hypocritical if you ask me.
Just because a white male is with an Asian female does not mean he suffers from “Yellow Fever.” A friend’s wife recently accused me of having yellow fever. I was offended by the accusation and felt that it debased my fiancé by stereotyping and objectifying her. I’m Scandinavian and have always preferred Scandinavian women. Where I live the Asian population is 2.5% so it’s not a place where you regularly rub shoulders with Asian people and Asian women have never been on my radar. To be honest I always saw Asians as a “model minority” that focuses more on their own culture rather than assimilation. I never had problems meeting women but had difficulty finding the right girl then I met and fell in love with a Chinese girl who possesses all of the qualities I desire in a wife and mother. I was concerned about cultural differences and communication problems and I had to come to terms with entering into a cross-cultural relationship that will face many difficulties other couples don’t face. The predominant local culture/religion here “discourages cross-cultural marriages.” Her Asian heritage was more of a negative factor rather than a positive factor when considering the relationship due to the concerns about the problems we could face in a cross-cultural marriage. True love has no bounds. I do not possess a “clear sexual preference for women of Asian descent to an obsessive degree.” I fell in love with a girl of Asian descent. I agree that men with yellow fever are creepy. It’s unfortunate that good family oriented men devoted to one Asian girl are lumped into this perception. It’s also interesting to note that, in my experience, the vast majority of people who vocally disapprove of cross-cultural relationships are Caucasian females.
I grew up in the SF Bay area and lived, worked in Hawai’i and China for years before returning to the US Mainland. Guess what? The majority of my friends are Asian and I’ve always been the the minority as the Gwai Lo or Haole. So it’s no surprise my GF’s were ethnically Asian and I eventually married a mainland Chinese woman. Our son just graduated high school & now onto college. So where we lived nobody cared and we didn’t think of using the Yellow Fever term.
But for you single White guys today interested in foreigners, Love may be blind but please learn another language, show respect for the culture and yes, make a commitment and marry the woman. You’ll be happier, live longer and no one can accuse you of this derogatory slang, Yellow Fever.
However there are millions of 2nd & 3rd generation brilliantly talented and beautiful Asian women already here in the US who may give you a chance if you’re empathetic, will listen, have patience, a sense of humor and treat her like a Queen. Then you just might make it.
Best to all,
Doug Ross
“Yellow Fever” and attraction are TWO different thing. A lot of times we intertwined them because we think that attraction to one race means for one to have “yellow” or “white” or “black” or “red” fever. Yes, I am less attracted to Asian men; however, I am more willing to date Asian men who ARE my friends rather than strangers. I am attracted to white men and it’s probably because I live in this country call United States of America that values the monoculture AND demean the other cultures. It’s probably “white” fever.
Candace,
After reading through your article on “Yellow Fever” I was really amazed by the amount of arrogance you express in your discussions. From the way that you write you sound like someone of average to above intelligence which is why the concept for your argument really puzzles me. If we break down your debate into the simple premise of men being attracted to women, then we all know men are attracted on a visual basis, where as women are attracted more on an emotional level.
So now we have this simple premise lets apply it to the concept of Yellow Fever, and Fever meaning that its a condition that is out of control and lacks any rational. Asian women physically are different to western women, they are even different to black, middle eastern, and any other races on this planet. If we use your theory we would naturally assume that there would be conditions such as Black Fever, or Arab Fever, have you ever heard of any such condition? You know at the bottom of this all comes one very apparent theme.
Asian women are very self conscious and shy about the way that they look, having spoken to numerous asian women they are constantly comparing themselves to White girls. I’ve never once met a White girl that compares herself with asian women. Deep down this term Yellow Fever is a form of racial hatred, and it shows extreme arrogance towards people. There will always be bizarre people that have fetishes in certain areas of their life, but going around labelling them and trying to place yourself above other people is not something that is morally right, and should never be encouraged.
Im actually amazed that Asian women care so passionately about using the phrase Yellow Fever. Is it not that of kids that go around name calling others, and as an adult you must surely have moved beyond this childish behaviour.
I will leave you with this question to mull over,
If an asian woman only likes to date western guys, does that mean she is suffering from White Hype?
_A
@ Anonymous
It doesn’t make you a creep at all. You dated her for three years and going through a breakup is very difficult and painful. Of course, you fell in love with her, so you will be more attracted to people that remind you of her until you’ve gotten over the breakup fully. Be careful; though, because someone who looks similar will not necessarily replace your ex-girlfriend’s personality and individual quirks. This is coming from my experience from having had a similar experience dating a Japanese man (from Fukushima). Best of luck for the future~ ???????
@Ericcson
I hope you don’t think that the majority of all ‘white’ women around the whole entire world are racist and have a problem with interracial dating. It’s nicer to judge a woman not for being from a particular race, but because she is special and beautiful as a person <3
It's not too hard...^_^`
How someone chooses to raise a child is not based on race, but how they were brought up as a child and what they're like at an individual. This means that culture may have some influence, but not always. In my experience, from living with different families in Asia, the women all had different ways of bringing up their children, just like other races of women. If you have found an Asian woman with wonderful, motherly features then it's great to appreciate her for her awesomeness (^_^)?
@Whoever wrote that Asian women are trying to look like 'white women'
Not all Asian women dress to look the same and it's great that there are so many different styles. If an Asian woman wants to follow a fashion trend then it doesn't mean that she idolises 'white' women. She might like a trend because she feels it makes her look unique, or ir enhances her natural features, or she just wants to fit in with her friends, or it expresses her endorsement of another culture, or it might be to look cool or beautiful ect. People wear makeup for many different reasons 🙂
In Asia there are women who are small, tall, petite, curvy, with curly hair, with straight hair, with wide eyes, with smiley eyes, with tanned skin, with paler skin, with thick lashes, with fine lashes, with different hair and eye colours. And each of these features vary completely for each person.
In short, the world is a very diverse place <3
Candace I agree with you. As an East Indian male I have to deal with the same kind of nonsense from white women. Most are too dense to even try acting smart. One time somebody straight out says ” wow if I never saw you I would never know if you were east indian, you don’t have an accent! lol!!”
Candace, you are kind and polite to say “sorry I don’t speak English” when a creepy weirdo total stranger walks up to you and says “I am looking for an Asian wife”, wtf?!? How about telling the goof “don’t boost yourself too much buddy!” that would be the best warranted response and as much as it is truthful most westerners would feel it is rude and inappropriate. Yea sure and like coming up and interrogating somebody’s ethnic background is the norm.
correction “Gold Digger” 😛
*Hahaha* I agree when you stated “All too often, we are conditioned by Asian culture to go out of our way to be polite. Being a nice person can’t outweigh the need to react properly in uncomfortable or threatening situations.” Also, getting hit on by non-Asian guys could sometimes be funny and annoying. I remember last time me and my best-girl friends (all Asians) went shopping at the mall. This guy (who happens to be white in his late 20’s) came and talked to us about how “he enjoyed Asia: Korea, Japan, Thailand, etc etc). We all got the vibe he thought we’re all foreigners, even though all of us are American born and have NEVER been to Asia. We weren’t rude to him, we actually liked listening to him talk (he was cute and charming).
Another time, while waiting under the tree reading my book before my next class starts, a guy (who happens to be white) came and said “Emily Dickinson is a good writer.” We conversed for about 8 or 10 minutes until he said “I have a lot of money and I have a big truck.” In my mind, I was thinking he thought I was desperate or a good digger… I immediately said “Oh, I’m late to class” although I went hiding in the library.
Well, most of the YELLOW FEVER are attracted any asian girls.
From my perspective and experiences with these guys, they are usually white males and are unpopular among white females.
They insist that they are not interested in blond girls but I assume that these yellow fevers know blond girls would not be attracted to these YELLOW FEVERs.
One of the Yellow fevers I know is terrible.
He learns and teaches Chinese and hangs out with many asian girls whichever country in asia she comes from.
He takes advantages of being a white male and just fucks with asian girls. He knows asian girls like blue eyes, white and takes care of girls a bit nicer than asian guys does it. One of his girls used to pay his expenses and travels ticket to Korea. The other girl from Taiwan paid every expense like food for him. This guys’ rumor were spread out among asian community in Arizona State University. But suprisingly he was selected by Flagship program and learned Chinese through these girls and girls in China. There are so many victims of this guys in asian countries. But unfortunately, these targeted girls do not think he is a barbarian. I warned my friend who was entrapped his love trap.
She still does not think he was a bad person.
Poor girls………. As a woman, I do not understand why these girls get involved in this guy.
He is not a good looking guy at all and he does not treat girls like any other american guy. There is no good things about him.
Well, I want asian girls take care of themselves and be strong to judge a guy like miles.
no your not
http://gawker.com/#!5785593/the-greatest-fake-girlfriend-story-ever-told
sick jewish guy with an asian fetish. read the story on gawker here.
I was wandering, do people veiw all couples of mixed race AS a preditor victim setup? My wife is chinese, i mean AS in from mainland china. We met when i traveled to china to basicly have a break and get far away from everything. Some rearlly kind people there hjelpes me indulge my interest for food and thaichi They arranged thaichi lessons for me every day and let me into the kitchens of some restaurants to observe and learn. Well the second day out for dinner one of the professors in the lokal universaty took her sister along. we fell in love very quickly, both of us had been through a bad relationship and both Divorced. After TWo years and me going to china six times and she coming to my country three times we Married. We do get stares from people and i know judgement. Well i am a chef, my wife has a docterate in teaching. I am the luckyest man avlive i think.