Secret to Happy Marriage: Do Dishes, Put Out, Shut Up
This Valentine’s Day, skip the chocolate, lingerie and jewelry. Instead, practice talking less, doing the dishes and putting out. Romantic? Maybe not. The secret to a life of wedded bliss? Quite possibly.
A little background. I just co-wrote a book called “Spousonomics: Using Economics to Master Love, Marriage & Dirty Dishes,” in which I take some well-established ideas from the dismal science and use them to show couples how they can improve their marriages. One of the first things people say when they hear about the book is something to the effect of, “Isn’t that kind of unromantic?” Well, yeah. But what’s romantic about dishes, laundry, diapers, bills, mortgages, in-laws, TiVo, company picnics, circular arguments, BlackBerries, hamsters, PTA meetings, and all the million other little things that go into a marriage and detract from the actual romance between two people who once loved each other so much they decided to keep each other company for the rest of their lives?
Herewith, five somewhat regressive, not very romantic, yet extremely effective lessons from economics for a happy marriage with long-term prospects:
1. Talk less.
2. Lose weight.
3. Do the dishes.
4. Put out
5. Scheme
Thinking ahead, learning from past experience, putting yourself in your spouse’s shoes—these are all strategies straight from the game-theory playbook (game theory being the study of behavior in strategic situations). In fact, if you think like a game theorist, you’ll find that marriage is really just a two-person repeated game. In the game, each person is trying to achieve the best results possible, given the limitations that there’s another person involved.
May the best Chess Player win!
I agree with this author 100 percent. I have been preaching this philosophy forever. I know firsthand because most of the men who chase after me are unfortunately married and miserable. They fantasize about an “escape” from their pathetic reality with me and I know that I am HARDLY the ONLY ONE that this happens to!
Many beautiful and hot single women experience this quite often! If I had a quarter for every married man who chased after me I would be on the Forbes List of Billionaires! Realistically speaking, single men come in smaller quantity. The reason being that they are FREE to date and have much more TIME for themselves. They also have much more to offer a woman.
Trips, jewelry, expensive dinners and other such “gifts” NEVER make up for a lack of commitment. Men who have nothing to offer you will do this to compete with the men (single) who can offer you something. It is far less expensive than divorce in more ways than one!
One thing I DO KNOW is that men hate women who yap yap yap about nothing all day. Don’t call your man all the time esp. when he is at work and let HIM do most of the talking about HIMSELF (his favorite subject).
Don’t come across as a die-hard feminist either. That is a HUGE turn-off to REAL men! It comes across as masculine, tough, emasculating the male gender, angry, bitter and volatile!