A Player’s category_ide to Sleeping At Her Place

This player has spent his share of nights sleeping at her place. With each morning, I have risen and exited with mutual satisfaction, mutual respect and an invitation to return. I’ve discussed how to pick up and how to conduct one’s self as a Player. Now we talk about one of the most harrowing of situations: sleeping at her place. Many a well-taught and equally well-trained Player has stumbled in this area. Wants and desires can be satisfied in her abode, but Players have a code and have style. Prepare yourself with these rules.

rule no. 1
Don’t send the wrong signals
Players do not break hearts. We do not leave a trail of dashed women behind as we pursue the next lay and layover. While the obvious wrong signal is to say “I love you” when it is not meant, there are others. These mistakes send the message that the sexual experience is more romantic and momentous than simple mutual gratification. This must be understood at the very beginning before a single piece of clothing comes off.

Actions to avoid include an intimate breakfast, spooning in the afterglow and making plans for what to do when you rise from the bed, couch or wherever you two have enjoyed one another. Starry-eyed stares over breakfast, cooking, bringing meals to bed, and cuddling post-coitus are acts that tell her this is more than it really is. If these acts are headed your way, be upfront and complimentary but not rude and insulting. Remember that you are not out to ignore this beautiful lady, as she has just shared something amazing with you. Treating her with silence or indifference not only is beneath a player, but it is insulting. There are compromises and roads in between the wrong signal of over-involvement and the icy tundra of apathy. A quick breakfast before parting is an appropriate exit. A sincere embrace before walking out the door is acceptable.

rule no. 2
Keep it fun
Spending the night does not automatically mean eight intense hours of dramatic sex. First, few will experience eight hours of intense, life-changing lovemaking (remember, you’re Player in training). Feel free to do other entertaining things together. Consider watching a movie (not a chick flick or she may get the wrong signal) or think about talking over drinks while watching the city from her view. Avoid serious conversations that delve into one another’s backgrounds or upbringings. Keep the talking light and seasoned with flirtation and the appropriate amount of innuendo. Will keeping it fun lead to sex? More than likely. The more relaxed and at ease a woman is, the more likely her libido will reflect this. Consider the moments after a heated pillow fight or teasing battle with desserts in the kitchen. These can easily translate into sexual activity that you will both enjoy and not confuse with romance.

Be sure to avoid being goofy or silly. Anyone less than a Player would go overboard and treat this eager and sexually charged young lady as if she was a dorm buddy. Having too much fun without aiming toward pleasure and sleeping at her place will ultimately give her one of two wrong ideas: One, she will find your humor and entertainment to be so enjoyable that your sex appeal will diminish rapidly. You will fall from a craved male to a court jester. Secondly, she will take your humor and entertainment to mean that you have no interest in her sexually. Now she will feel rejected and eager to tell her girlfriends about you in less than flattering discussions.

“Make sure that you do not lead her on by bringing her along on your morning routine because you feel bad or pity her. ”
Keep romance out of the equation.
Keep your activities casual, like watching a movie, rather than having a serious conversation.
Let her know ahead of time that you have an early morning and cannot spend the night.

rule no. 3
Keep some things to yourself
Sex with a beautiful woman who unexpectedly invites you home could catch any Player off guard. One coping technique is to talk, talk and talk about yourself incessantly. Stop immediately. Yammering on will quickly turn this lady’s mind from wanting you to stay to wondering when you will leave. A little dash of mystery will remind her of that which she wants and cannot have.

The extreme of this tip must be guarded against as well. Being too mysterious can lead a woman to either view you as a stranger or a shady individual; neither of the two will result in sleeping at her place. A stranger is so guarded with his information that she feels no connection and, therefore, is completely turned off. No woman you want to sleep next to with both eyes closed is going to bed a stranger. The shady individual you may be portraying will be going home alone. When overdone, the lack of details and information can lead a woman to believe that you have something to hide. For all she knows, it is anything from a false identity to a body in your trunk.

Keep the conversation cursory and even playful (refer to the tip above). But also keep a sense of flirtation and sexuality in your discussions. Remember that anyone’s favorite topic of discussion is themselves, so talk about her. She has you at her place, and there is an entire house, condo or hotel room to discuss. While she talks, she will find your interest in her an arousing feature. All the while, you are not talking about yourself.

rule no. 4
Morning activities are out of the question
Your regular day-to-day morning activities may have to be postponed when sleeping at her place. Why? Because, more than likely, she’ll want to join you. If you and your newly bedded woman jog together, drink coffee together and just hang out together, she will see your night together as more than mutual gratification. Your morning routines are yours, and if you were to share them, it would be at the right time and with the right woman. Your respected partner from last night is still only your partner from last night. Make sure that you do not lead her on by bringing her along on your morning routine because you feel badly or pity her.

Now, you do not just say “bye” and then roll out. You are a Player, not a coyote eating its own arm to escape a trap. As you realize you are going to spend the night, get prepared. Have an excuse ready (refer to the next tip) so that your morning cup of Joe is not one filled with starry eyes, cup sharing and wrong signals being sent. Tell her you had a great time, kiss and then exit.

“While it was probably a one-night stand, it does not have to be a sleepover from hell full of deceit, indifference and lies.”
Better Man in brief …
Keep romance out of the equation.
Keep your activities casual, like watching a movie, rather than having a serious conversation.
Let her know ahead of time that you have an early morning and cannot spend the night.

rule no. 5
Come prepared with a rolodex of excuses
While not a fan of excuses, this Player recognizes the need for an exit strategy. Let her know as you bed each other that you will need to leave in the morning. The reason for your leaving may vary. Some use the need to get to work early as an explanation. Others say they need to pick up a friend coming into town or that they have an early family obligation. Why is this early seeding of an excuse a good tactic? It sets the groundwork for a quick and solo exit in the morning. Otherwise, you may find yourself stumbling over a dozen weak explanations for your hurried goodbye. But be very careful with this concept, as you do not want to begin weaving a trail of lies. A Player is far from a liar and manipulator.

If you are interested in seeing her again, let her know, get her information and honestly state your interests. You can always insert a time frame in which you feel you will sincerely get back to her.

slumber party
Legendary actor and burned-out player Dudley Moore once said, “I’m always looking for meaningful one-night stands.” Let this quote category_ide you when sleeping at her place. While it was probably a one-night stand, it does not have to be a sleepover from hell full of deceit, indifference and lies. Avoid the pitfalls of lesser men that either try to make the night more than it was or try to lower its value in order to deal with their own inadequacies.

You have an invitation to a remarkable evening with a beautiful woman. Grab your toothbrush, grab her and don’t hate The Player.