Life Goes On, and On …

Scientists are closing in on the mechanism of what are called “senescent cells,” which cause the tissue deterioration responsible for aging. Studies of mice suggest that targeting these cells can slow down the process. “Every component of cells gets damaged with age,” Leonard Guarente, a biology professor at M.I.T., explains. “It’s like an old car. You have to repair it.” We’re not talking about immortality, Professor Guarente cautions. Biotechnology has its limits. “We’re just extending the trend.” Extending the trend? I can hear it now: 110 is the new 100. Is this a good thing or a bad thing? On the debit side, there’s the … debit. The old-age safety net is already frayed. According to some estimates, Social Security benefits will run out by 2037; Medicare insurance is guaranteed only through 2024. These projected shortfalls are in part the unintended consequence of the American health fetish. The ad executives in “Mad Men” firing up Lucky Strikes and dosing themselves with Canadian Club didn’t have to worry. They’d be dead long before it was time to collect.

Then there’s the question of whether reaching 5 score and 10 is worth it — the quality-of-life question. Who wants to end up — as Jaques intones in “As You Like It” — “sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything”? You may live to be as old as Methuselah, who lasted 969 years, but chances are you’ll feel it. Worse — it’s no longer a rare event — you can outlive your children. Can anything more tragic befall a parent than to be predeceased by a child? These are the perils old people suffer. What about the boomers, now elderly children? One challenge that entitled generation faces is that many of their long-lived parents are running through their retirement money, which leaves the burden of supporting them. (To their credit, it’s a burden that often bothers their parents, too.) And the cost of end-stage health care is huge — a giant portion of all medical expenses in this country are incurred in the last months of life. Meanwhile, their prospects of retirement recede on the horizon.

So what’s the good part? Time spent with an elderly parent can offer an opportunity for the resolution of “unfinished business,” a chance to indulge in last-act candor. A college classmate writes in our reunion book of ministering to her chronically ill mother and being “moved by how the twists and turns of complicated health care have deepened our relationship.” I hear a lot about late-in-life bonding between parent and child. What about Rupert Murdoch? His mother is 102.

Personally, when women older than my mom (Jane Fonda) crave the spotlight and try to look like mummies who resemble wax figures from Madame Tussaudes, it is time to throw in the towel and call it a day. I know I speak for so many when I say that is very scary and embarrassing for women of all ages. There is something very distasteful and disturbing about hearing an old prune talk about having “great” sex in the media. Trust me, no one wants to hear about great grandma groaning–gross! The show is over at some point as it was for Gloria Swanson in “Sunset Boulevard.” By all means, make the final act a quiet, personal and dignified one.