Hello Kitty Apocalypse (Laughter Rx 1)

Worried about a zombie apocalypse? I’m not, because I’ve got a MUCH bigger problem – my home is, at this very moment, overrun by hordes of Hello Kitties! They’ve taken over! Everywhere I turn, that anthropomorphic white feline is staring right back at me, her eyes saying what she cannot (given that she has no mouth):

“Sucka!”

And what can I say? She’s right. I have no one to blame for my Hello Kitty Apocalypse but myself. I let them into my home. To be sure, many were gifts from friends and relatives. But all I had to do to prevent the HK takeover was to be the parent and just say no. I did not, and as a consequence, these Hello Kitty-branded items currently can be found in my home:

19 dolls and toys
21 books and coloring books
14 school supply items
Hundreds of stickers
1 sewing craft kit
4 magnets
4 keychains
9 bags
7 food containers and utensils
7 pairs footwear
22 pieces of clothing
1 sock organizer
20 plastic jewelry pieces
34 hair accessory pieces
6 bedding and linen pieces
1 box of Band-Aids

Like I said, they’ve taken over!

Hey, don’t give me that judgmental stink eye. I’ll bet a lot of you have Hello Kitties in your home, too. And if you’re a parent to young Asian American daughters, I can guarantee it. Some of you even have more than my family does!

But I confess, I do lie awake at night, anxiously tossing and turning while I wrestle with the possibility that I’ve doomed them to a slippery slope. Will they grow up to be two of those hard-core fans that fly EVA Air’s Hello Kitty planes en route to Taipei’s Hello Kitty restaurant and Japan’s Hello Kitty theme parks? What have I done?

And then, in the darkness, a comforting thought calms my parental nerves:

Better an HK Apocalypse than a Disney Princess Apocalypse!