5 Tips for getting back into the Dating Game this Spring!

After this long and weary winter I know, like me, you are itching to shed those winter clothes and ready yourself for the Season of Love. A lot of people tend to go into ‘hibernation’ mode during the cold winter months with promises to self of ‘I will snap out of it when the weather gets warm’. Well, the time is here and now it’s time to put your money where your mouth is.

I find that setting realistic and attainable goals, whether they are short term or long term is the best game plan if you want to accomplish anything in life, and that also certainly pertains to love.

Here are my 5 tips to getting you back into the game:

1. Set a Goal: Goal setting is the #1 way to accomplish anything. This is the starting point because this will drive your actions. Without direction of where you want to go, that’s comparable to driving without a road map or clear directions of how to get from point A to point B. You might eventually get there, but probably with many detours, rerouting and backtracking. And for me a lot of wasted time and energy that could be better put to use in actually getting to where you want to go. (Love Example: I will go to 10 new places to meet eligible men).
2. Make an Intention List: You would be surprised to learn that setting your intentions on something, like for example, I want to lose % pounds by a specific date, will get you there faster than just having a ‘pie in the sky’ attitude about it. For me, my intentions drive my actions. And as you well know, just thinking about it and mulling over it is far less effective than stating your intention about a specific goal and giving yourself a deadline. (Love Example: I will meet 5 desirable dates by May 1st by being more approachable).
3. Write a Commitment Letter: Writing things down always has been proven to be a powerful tool in accomplishing anything in life and this holds true for your love life also. I’ve found that when I write a Commitment Letter to myself and sign it, it becomes more concrete and tangible as opposed to just a promise I make to myself. I print out my Commitment Letter and sign and date it and post it on my fridge or somewhere I will see it every day. This will serve as a reminder of what my goal is and keep me on track in fulfilling that promise and keeping the commitment to myself.
4. Progress Report: Keeping a progress report that charts your efforts will give you a visual of how far you’ve come and how far you have to go to meet your goal. This is an incredibly powerful and motivating technique that I’ve found invaluable when I want to succeed. Make a daily progress report with the following: a) Goal for the day, b) Was it done, c) Course of action if you did not meet your daily goal and a new due date, d) Initial the new due date and move forward. This will allow you to have off days but not to allow you to wallow in your misstep. There is nothing worse than beating yourself up when things don’t go as planned. Just assess where you went wrong, acknowledge it, make a new plan and move FORWARD.
5. Reward: I’ve found that having a payoff, whether it be buying that pair of killer shoes I’ve been eyeing, or splurging on a massage, always keeps me motivated, especially on those days when your energy is sapped and you begin to rationalize why you don’t need to keep track on your commitment. It doesn’t have to be anything big or expensive, but something tangible and something you really want that makes you feel special.

Ultimately it is whatever that will keep you motivated to succeed.