I Dunno Jack

I honestly don't know what's better — being jack of all trades or being a specialist?

It was absolute horror the other day: I was laying in bed with my feet on my pillows and my face towards the ceiling. I was closely observing the cracks on my ceiling when I had an epiphany.

I. Am. Not. Good. At. Anything.

Oh god… let's assess this rationally.

For me, talent is a parable that was told by Jesus. A hobby is something that you enjoy doing during your spare time — which makes mine shopping and eating (lots too). Sports? Doesn't exist in my vocab (or my world). Music? Well, I did take lessons when I was younger. I skipped most of them. 'Nuf said. Art? I can draw stick figures perfectly 🙂 My major in college? Please… I went to business school to take up IT. So I'm half-baked in between business and IT. And my job? Well, that's precisely it. It's a job. Nothing more.

I did pretty well in school back in those days. I had my fair share of awards and honors… but come on, doing well in school is hardly any specialization. It simply meant I succumbed to the pressures that my (very Asian) parents have given me… and I worked hard. It doesn't really mean anything more at the end of the day.

And this brings us back to square one: I still am not good in anything. Sure, I can do a lot of things but none of those things I excel in. I can cook without managing to poison anyone; I can be artistic but only if it's abstract; I can write a computer program as long as it doesn't involve complex cases and as long as I have Google; I can sing karaoke; I can bowl, if you count that as a sport, and sometimes I can even hit a birdie when playing badminton… you get the idea. It's pretty pathetic, really.

So what's the deal? What do I say to St. Peter when I arrive by the gates of heaven when he asks me what my biggest accomplishments are?

That I have this blog where I pour out my hypochondriac thoughts?

He will totally keel over in laughter…